Reflections

 

Lisa Marie
Pernick

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Lisa Marie was played in the WHITE WOLF: VAMPIRE role playing system. She's a vampire who found Golconda and became human again, and is thus is a retired character.

There are some who say Golconda is just a myth. A plot of the Camarilla/ Sabbat/ whoever to control you, a delusion by Malkavians, or even worse things. But I know it exists because I found it, and with it I found the inner peace I had longed for.
You can find it too, if you really want to. Because believe me, if I can find it ... you can too.

Becoming a vampire isen't this beautiful seduction scene like it it in the movies. Where you are with a gorgeous guy, seduced by lust and power and you want to be with your perfect immortal lover forever. No, my own embrace was quite different then that.
I was human once. Just a normal girl with a normal life, nothing all that special about me. I worked a second shift job I hated, in the downtown area which was pretty much deserted by 6PM.

There was nothing special about the day. No omens or portents of what was to come, just a boring day like so many others. Walking to my car after work around midnight I saw a little girl on the streets. This was hardly the place for adults to be walking around alone, much less a child. I approached her and asked her if she was lost, and told her I could drive her to the police station where they could help her find her parents.
Then she did the strangest thing - she just stared at me and smiled. And though I was looking at a little 6 year old girl, I was suddenly very, very afraid.
"You are so nice. Not a lot of people would have helped me, but you would. Now I'll help you." and she leaped on me. She was stronger then any child every had a right to be, and I felt my life drain away as she bit down on my neck.
I woke up in an alley with a dead guy in front of me. My hands were covered in blood, my clothes were covered in blood. I was confused and terrafied and sick all at once. I ran away. I went home to my apartment, and hid. I found out later on that Sue was watching me, and burned the guy's body after I had left.
How's that go again? Oh yes - "No good deed goes unpunished."

My "sire" found me the next night. There was a knock on my door, and a frumpy teen girl said she could explain last night to me. I let her in. She introduced herself to me as "Sue", and explained everything about being a vampire to me. It was a big shock to me. At first I thought being a vampire was kind of cool, it was certianly a step up from my miserable life before. But when she told me she was leaving me alone here to spy on the other vampires here, I was hesitant. I didn't like being alone.
The sleeping during the day and no sunlight thing was a major change. Of course I lost my job, and the few friends I had followed shortly thereafter. They never mention stuff like that in the vampire legends though.
On the up side, I managed to make friends with Lucian, the Gangrel vampire who lived in the zoo next to my apartment. I told him I was an "anarch", like my sire said, and he didn't ask much past that. I spent what time I could with him, but it was pretty lonley here.

A month later Sue returned, and told me it was time to become a 'True Sabbat'. First she did the creation rites with me, and taught me the Path she followed - the Path of Catheri. Catheri wasn't really me, but I tried to learn it to please Sue.
Then she said I had to prove myself by killing an enemy. I followed along, prepaired to do whatever it takes not to be alone anymore. We fed from and ghouled a human each, then attacked a lone Tremere and his 2 ghouls. We won, although Sue's new ghoul died in the process. Sue told me to drink from the Tremere. I did, and it was quite a rush. After I was done, Sue explained diablerie, and told me I could learn Thaumaturgy now because of his blood. She also warned me to keep out of sight for a month or so, as it would show up in my aura.
I was very lonley, and I wanted to embrace the new ghoul I'd just made so I wouldn't be alone anymore. Sue said that was ok, as I was a True Sabbat now and he had fought well. I did embrace him, and he didn't get back up. We waited and waited, but nothing happened. Sue explained that sometimes happens, but usually not for several more generations removed from Caine.
"He isn't going to be getting back up, is he?" I asked, and Sue shook her head. Great. Now I was an immortal vampire damned to eternity alone. I understood for the first time when Lucian told me being kindred was a curse, not an honor.
I stayed hidden for awhile after that. I only left my home to feed, and I was very careful not to be seen. I drove all the way up to Niagara Falls to feed, just to be careful. My black veins faded quickly, as I was lower generation then the Tremere was.

I was still miserable from feeling cursed to an eternity alone, and wasn't paying as much attention as I should have been while feeding. I was following this rather deranged looking homeless guy, who turned into an alleyway. When I turned in to follow him I found myself nose to nose with him. It was about then that I noticed his aura was a bright pissed-off red color all over.
Normally you'ed think I would have died right there, but fate was in a humorous mood. Turns out he was a Black Spiral Dancer werewolf who had just lost his whole pack in their "spiral pit". Whatever. All that really mattered was he was as lonley as I was, and he didn't care if I was a sabbat vampire who killed other vampires as long as I didn't care that he was a werewolf without a pack. He said his name was Whoo. OK, I could even live with weird names as long as I wasn't alone anymore. He came home with me, and the two of us became a pack.
When Sue returned, she was not happy. Ok, pissed is more like it. I got a long speech on the superiority of vampires and how I shouldn't associate with werewolves. I told he I sick and tired of being so alone with no one to talk to or trust, and if he was the only pack I could have then I wasn't going to leave him. For now Sue dropped it, but I could see this was going to end badly someday.

Over time our pack grew, as we got a few more werewolves who joined us. Whoo took occassional trips up to his "sept", which was somewhere up in Canada. He said it would probably be bad for me to go, which was fine with me. I waited for them here. I practiced Sue's Vaulderie rite with them, effectively blood bonding them to me.
Eventually I went to NYC to meet Sue's Pack, and they were all as sick and whacked out as she was. The only good point of the trip was the Nosferatu who taught me Path of Honorable Accord. He really seemed to have his act together. What he was doing with those loonies I have no clue. The rest of her pack I didn't like much, but I tried to hide it and be nice.
On the way home from NYC, our pack managed to do very well in Syracuse, a siege city, picking off Camarilla and Sabbat vampires alike. We killed about 8 vampires total. I managed to obtain the library of a Tremere antitribu, and I spent much time once we were back home learning Thaumaturgy.

Still weighed down by lonliness and not understanding what I was doing, I worked with a Tzimisce "doctor" to make my human boyfriend 'special'. We were trying to make him a werewolf kinfolk so he wouldn't run in terror when my pack changed in front of him, but again fate seemed to have it in for me. A few days later he told me of being bitten by a giant rat and then getting very sick. By hte time I made it over to his house his fever was almost up to 104. I took him back to the doc, who really couldn't help him much. The sickness lasted 3 days before his fever broke and he leaped up off the bed a giant man-rat.
I got my only two remaining friends embraced - Brian became a Lasombra and Ben became a Kiasyd. They both went their own ways though, and I was still alone.
We attacked a werewolf "sacred place" in Niagara Falls NY, and with the help of some more werewolf allies and a powerful Abomination, we trashed the place. All werewolves were either killed or escaped, and the caern's power was taken by the Abomination.
Deciding that I really didn't want to be in the Sabbat after all, and still pissed off at my sire for embracing me, I decided to kill her. Then I realized what I really wanted was to be free, an this would require killing all of them, the whole pack. I set up an ambush where I lured my sire and her whole pack to come and 'rescue' me from the Tremere who had blood bound me. (bullshit story, but good bait nonetheless) The Tremere were aware of the "upcoming sabbat attack", and with some help from me and my werewolf pack we killed them all. I was finally free of the Sabbat.
I helped the Tremere whip become Primogen, then Prince. This involved a lot of dirty work, and killing a lot of kindred. We discovered a mutually benificial relationship in each other, and we were stronger together then apart. As Prince he made me his sheriff and my werewolves his deputies, and I got to cause a lot of havoc and kill many vampires. I had power and money - by vampire standards I should be happy, but I wasn't. I was getting more and more disgusted by the night.

 

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