Mallory Wind Dancer
Mallory Wind Dancer is played in the WHITE WOLF: BASTET role playing system.
This is a diary I wrote for Megan right after her birth, just in case anything ever happened to me. I left her with my good friends Philbert, and Uktena Theurge, and his kinfolk wife Bonnie. Bonnie was unable to have kids and welcomed my little girl. I then went off to take some time alone and put my life in order.
One of these days Megan, you'll be reading this. I hope I am here for that day, but if anything should happen to me I want you to know what your mom really was like. Some of the things you read about me may disappoint you, but remember none of us are without our weaknesses. I've made some mistakes but I've learned from them too. If I never get a chance to say it enough, know that I love you more then life itself and I would die for you. You were always wanted and loved, even though I wasn't there to raise you when you were young.
I was born a lynx and raised by kinfolk of my mother. My youth was spent sunning on rocks, hunting food, and avoiding the farmers who would hunt us because they believed that we killed their sheep or cows. I was lucky enough to be born with sharp senses, so I never had much problem hunting or avoiding the no furs. Tracking and hunting came easily to me, and we never went without food although we did have to move to different areas sometimes. My kinfolk taught me well the danger that no furs presented, and I avoided them. Not that all the no furs were bad; a few hampered the bad ones in their slaughter of other animals and destruction of the forest. For the most part though, I avoided no furs with a "better safe then sorry" attitude. Shortly after my nightmares of the no furs started my mom came to teach me the ways of the Bastet.
It was quite a shock to be able to become one of the no furs that I had so disliked, until I learned just what a special gift it really was. I learned to change forms, use gifts, and most importantly I learned the history of the Bastet. We can't really know who we are until we know where we came from, so this is important stuff. Mother of Catkind gifted some of her monkey children and decided to make some of them special. They became two skins, or shape changers like you and me. She made many different kinds, and many of us roamed about in harmony. Then the Weaver went mad and took the Wyrm with her. After that, the Wyrm corrupted many of the two skins and the Garou destroyed the rest. The Silver Fang tribe led the Garou in a War of Rage first against the gentle Gurahl (bears), and eventually all other two skins. Their Garou packs were able to easily outclass other lone two skins, and so we began to die out. For awhile, all Garou served the Wyrm in the battle for extinction against two skins, some by participation and others by silence and apathy. No one knows what finally brought them to their senses, but a Garou tribe called Children of Gaia claim they helped the Silver Fangs see the error of their ways. By then it was too late, the damage was done. Listen carefully here daughter - never turn your back on a Garou. Never. Their rage makes them unreliable and Wyrm bait. This is especially true of the Silver Fangs, for Mother of Catkind has made them all insane in punishment for their egotistical reign of terror. Never forget all Garou either slaughtered or allowed to be slaughtered your ancestors. Only the tribe called Shadow Lords did not participate in the War of Rage, and helped some of our kind survive. A rare few Garou have been worthy of trust, but more on that later. As you go forth into the world, never forget you are the eyes of Mother of Catkind, and you please her by learning secrets while giving away none. Enough history - back to my story.
Once mom knew I could fend for myself in the wilds and I could tell which of the no furs were Wyrm tainted and which were not, we left for the Black Hills of South Dakota. Along the way I began learning homid language, and dressing in homid clothes. We stayed with some Sioux friends of hers , Philbert Tale Spinner and Bonnie Running Rabbit. They were very accepting of us and never got upset at my mistakes, from language to manners. It was a gentle introduction to homids, and prepared me well for what I would soon face in the cities. I learned a lot about the corruption of homids and what they had done to the Native Americans, and how the whites use and break treaties and laws as it pleases them. I also learned skills of the Native Americans like herbalism, midwifery, and jewelry making from Bonnie. All too quickly mom said it was time to leave for the city.
The night before we were to leave for the city, Philbert ask if he could tattoo me. He insisted on picking the design and having it be a surprise. These people had done so much for me, I found myself ashamed of the hesitation I felt. Behind the mobile home he and Bonnie made a circle of rocks, and Bonnie fetched some things and placed them next to the circle. Then Philbert said it was time to begin. Mom and Bonnie sat outside the circle and he invited me inside with him. He burned sage and cedar in an abalone shell and ask Gaia to cleanse this space and make it pure and clean for his sacred work. He lightly brushed us all down with an Eagle feather passed through the smoke, and ask us to open our hearts and minds to Gaia. He sat me down in the center and ask the spirits of the Four Elements to welcome me. He painted the Northern rock green and ask the North Wind to grant me wisdom and keep me connected to the Earth and my heritage. He painted the East rock yellow and ask the East Wind to always keep me creative and to keep my senses sharp. He painted the South rock red and ask the South Wind to see that I always had faith in myself and in the world, and to protect me. He painted the West rock blue and ask the West Wind to share with me it's sacred dreams and insights and teach me compassion for all Gaia's Children. He then painted each of the colors on my face and blessed me in Gaia's name. It was a very moving experience, and you could feel the energy of life, of Gaia, everywhere around us. "You will be as restless as the winds during your life, and you will go far places and see many things. You will be called Wind Dancer" At this point he bade me to lay face down in the sweet earth. I felt creme being rubbed into my right shoulder and then a slow, steady digging. I tried to relax myself as Philbert told me tales of his life - his times with his best friend Buddy and how they went to bail out Buddy's sister, Bonnie. How they met and fell in love, and came to be in this wonderful land the Creator gave them. How they battle with the white men who would rape the Black Hills of it's natural treasure while the Native Americans live in poverty nearby. Philbert's voice was soothing, and despite the pain I found myself relaxed and dreaming scenes from all the stories he told. "We are almost done, Wind Dancer. This last part is the hardest, so don't move a muscle." Philbert held me down with a hand on my other shoulder, and I absently wondered how I had never noticed how strong he was before. I felt a deep digging into my shoulder and then a burning. I cried out, but mom was motioning me to stay still. I closed my eyes and tried to concentrate on other things, but it was so hard. Philbert was chanting in Sioux, and I did not understand him. My back was on fire now, and I was trying to muster the resolve to stay still. Then the hands lifted and there was a howl right behind me. My heart almost stopped when a Crinos werewolf stepped in front of me. Mom smiled and as I looked there was Philbert's favorite elk tooth necklace and Eagle feathers on his ear. He changed back to homid in front of me, and I was awestruck. He handed me mirrors so I could see my tattoo. It was a white snow leopard cub sitting on Selene, the Moon. "In your wanderings you will always be able to make friends." He closed the ritual and we sat around a campfire near the circle. I thanked him for the tattoo and the gift, and we hugged. He explained he was of a tribe called Uktena, who other Garou envy and fear because of their spirit knowledge and lore, and a Theurge, one who deals with the spirit world. We spent the rest of the night talking about Garou, and mom reminded me that although Philbert and Bonnie were our true friends, most Garou are not to be trusted. Again Megan, I warn you that most Garou should not be trusted but there are exceptions to everything. In the morning we said our good-byes and were off.
Don't know why, but mom chose Chicago for my education into cities. I had thought cities were big, scary, and confusing - they were all that and more. The noise, colors and just the extreme gaudiness of it all scared me at first. But mom showed me many interesting things in cities, and I got kind of dazzled by it all. I had thought sensual was a forest glen in the moonlight, but I soon found hot tubs, champagne, and chocolate covered strawberries were giving my old ideas a run for their money. My newfound curiosity of the no furs helped me to learn much of homid ways quickly. My favorite place to watch homids was in the dance clubs - dancing was fun and the music was intoxicating, not to mention homid mating rituals were funny to watch (Still are!). Mom taught me the basics of homid rituals - language, money, driving, self-defense, and laws so that I felt at ease in the city. I got a basic knowledge of how to use the tools of homids - like phones, toaster ovens, and video games. Once mom felt I had the base skills for survival in city or country, she told me I was now an Adult Bastet free to make my way in the world.
I was curious about the whole world back then, and didn't know where to start exploring. I wanted to meet some of the mages and vampires I had heard about, but vampires seem to be in big cities only and mages are scarce. I traveled for awhile, and eventually came to settle in Hilton Head, SC. The ocean was beautiful, and the beaches were a market of sensuality. I was faced with getting a homid "job" so I decided to dance in a strip club. Although I wasn't the most attractive girl there, I was one of the best liked (and tipped) because the sensuality of a cat that surrounded me. My natural good grooming made the best of what I had, and I learned how to use clothes to make me look even better. I rented a nice beach cottage, filled a closet with clothes of silks and rayons, and enjoyed all the sunrises with sand between my toes I desired. Life was good.
Before long I was dating a man who came to watch me dance. Bill had a wonderful personality and was a charming and successful man, and he was handsome despite his short stature and his weight problem. Bill gave me good sex, flowers every morning, a charge card to Victoria's Secret, redecorated my cottage, and leased a car for me. This happiness was short lived, however. Bill offered to pay all my bills and take care of me financially if I would quit dancing. It got ugly quickly, and a shouting match ensued. I yelled I would never give up my dancing or my freedom and I could not be bought, and Bill angrily replied he should have stuck to renting me. He stormed out and I never seen him again.
Life went on, but I was much more careful of getting involved. It was here that I met my first mage, a Cult of Ecstasy follower named Kyle. Mom had taught me how to sense Wyrm taint and how to sense magic, but this was the first time I sensed it so strong it left me with no doubt what Kyle was. It was in a heavy metal club called The Battery - across the room I saw his long black hair and cute ass, and I couldn't resist to see what else there was. I thought I was picking him up for a hot night of lust, but soon I was wondering who had picked whom. Kyle was hot, both in his good looks and the way her carried himself. He opened up a new door to my perceptions. Kyle was a guitarist in a band, and made beautiful music. He got me into "soft" drugs like grass and mushrooms (Gaia's gifts?) but I never tried some of the weird chemical concoctions he took (and I'd suggest you don't either, little one). Sex between us was awesome, better then it had ever been. For awhile I was what he called "custos" - a companion of a mage. This includes anyone from a animal familiar to an unawakened mortal friend to equal beings like vampires, two skins, and us. When the band wasn't practicing or playing out, we spent most of our time partying with his friends. I also learned about other groups of mages, and about Ascension. Looking back now, I think I fell for him mostly because he didn't demand my time, attention, or fidelity. Unfortunately it ended badly with Kyle. On reflection, it was my fault because I was so enamored I became a pain in the ass to him. He started to pull away from my clinging and that made me want him more, until he finally told me the band was going on tour - and I was not coming with him. I will never regret the year we spent together, it was a period of learning and growing for me. If I was more secure in myself like I am now I wouldn't have been so clingy, but then I also would not have wanted him. The time we spent together was fun but it came to an end. He was not the right man for me but I still miss him - he was my first love.
Breaking up with Kyle led me to ask some pretty deep questions about who I was and what I wanted. The answers weren't in Hilton Head, so I decided to leave. I sold off most of my stuff and went off across the country again. Getting back in touch with nature was good for me, and I did not like thinking I had so easily been distracted from the Wyld by simple Weaver trinkets. I was beginning to figure out where I really belonged.
Probably because it was familiar, I soon hooked up with some cool folks following a band. They called themselves "dead heads" (after the band), and I learned a lot from them. I liked the free and relaxed lifestyle they led, and started to feel like a person again and not an object. I liked the jewelry the girls wore and one of the girls there taught me bead working. It was similar to the Native American way I had learned before, and I became pretty good at basic jewelry making. I also learned a great deal about different stones and what they mean. Incorporating crystals and gem stones into my jewelry made it salable in new age and occult shops also, and before long I was able to support myself. Not that I lived like I used to, but I always had gas in the jeep, food in the cooler and grass to smoke. This is when I learned about paganism, and found most of the homids that follow it are pretty cool. I'm telling you Megan, if the whole world was made of those folk the Wyrm wouldn't have a chance. I also learned a lot about herbalism and midwifery. I'll bet you didn't know that before you were born I delivered two homid babies. It was a much more simpt follow it are pretty cool. I'm telling you Megan, if the whole world was made of those folk the Wyrm wouldn't have a chance. I also learned a lot about herbalism and midwifery. I'll bet you didn't know that before you were born I delivered two homid babies. It was a much more simple and calm period of my life, and I was content.
I had been traveling with the dead heads about 3 months when I finally decided to see a doctor. I had been run down and tired, and even sick sometimes. I blew it all off to the stress in my life over losing Kyle, but finally I decided to see if something was really wrong. Sunbeam went with me to the homid medical center, and it's a good thing she did or I'd have about lost my mind. After answering a bunch of annoying and irrelevant questions, I gave them a urine sample. Sunbeam came in to wait with me, and it seemed like forever before the doctor came back. Pregnant. I'd have never thought it! True, I did go into season around when Kyle left me but É Wow! After the shock I was happier then I ever thought I could be. The doctor wrote me a prescription for vitamins, suggested I see an ob/gyn, and mentioned odd things in my urine that should be checked? Oh shit! I knew right away what he was referring to but I allowed him to believe it was anemia. I stayed on the road with the band for another 4 months making as much money as I could with my jewelry, and then headed back to Phil and Bonnie. They were only too happy to see me, and I gave them all my money and asked them to help me raise you. Squatting behind their mobile home with Phil holding my back and Bonnie helping, you were born. I could not think of two better people in the world to raise you, and you had your dad's dark hair and eyes to pass for an Indian. I stayed until you were three months old and then left.
Motherhood slowed my lifestyle down a bit and made me remember what's really important. I came back near my old home to live in Minnehaha Park, where Minnehaha Falls of Longfellow's Hiawatha was written (outside of Minneapolis). There's a smaller, practically ignored waterfall close by to it and if you swim through this big pool to underneath the waterfall you can find my home. There is a narrow tunnel big enough for a cat that if you follow, it turns into a cave. This is my true hideout, my peaceful fortress to hide away in. The inside is pretty plain but I don't need much. There's a comfy hammock and some pillows, all my clothes and jewelry making supplies, and pictures of our family. I'm far enough outside of town to give me peace and serenity when I need it, but close enough to allow quick access if I want it. It's a more comfortable subdued area and a quieter life then before, and I like it that way.
-- END DIARY
This set is based on a painting called "To Sail Beyond The Sunset" by Luis Royo
Copyright 1996-2003 Robin Connor. All Rights Reserved.