101 Witty Paladin Sayings

bar

  1. And now, judgement!
  2. Ahhh c'mon guys, its not so bad ... Its just the Abyss
  3. (to a demon) You are one _ugly_ motherfucker.
  4. To the undead..."You won't be so lucky this time."
  5. Save your diseases for the less righteous."
  6. Looks like you've lost a few fights in your day."
  7. I've come to demand the surrender of Hell!
  8. EVERY day is judgement day!
  9. Hey, foul villains! Knock off all that evil!!
  10. The first step in making friends is *not to eat people*.
  11. May my sword do my God's will!
  12. Un-tentacle that fair ingenou!
  13. Eat my shorts, dark spawn of fat women!!!
  14. Evildoers! Eat my Justice!
  15. Fight, fight, fight. That's all I do around here. Day-in, day-out.
  16. Bash this, slice that, castrate whatever. How come I don't get to any of the fun stuff?"
  17. Prepare to make your maker!
  18. I am prepared to meet my maker, are you?
  19. Try not to bleed all over my boots.
  20. (talking to his sword) "Here's the goblin I promised you."
  21. After defeating but not dispatching..."Remember, no matter where you go, or how powerful you become, there will always be someone out there mightier than you. And that someone is me."
  22. You demons are all alike... blah, blah, blah."
  23. The courage of one can change the destiny of many.
  24. Surrender now or face me! ..no, no... Give up now and I mean it! ..no ..You still have a chance to surr (finishes his charge and attacks), oh, never mind.
  25. (If fighting some beautiful enemy) Back foul temptress! Even though thine image dost set my loins afire, I shall not be deterred from my task!
  26. while attacking: "OUCH! Now that's GOTTA hurt!"
  27. (after a brawl to opponent) Here are your teeth ...
  28. Die, creature of darkness!
  29. You! Yes, you! The boney thing! Die!
  30. Ad majorem dei gloriam. "For the greater glory of God."
  31. It's a great day to be a Paladin!
  32. Come out and fight foul spawn of the underworld.
  33. after battle: "That's it?"
  34. Has anyone seen my sword? (amidst piles of bodies)
  35. Whoa, lookit the gash on that one!
  36. Well, I don't know about ya'all, but I could use a drink.
  37. I challenge you in the name of Tyr, God of Justice!
  38. I am ___, champion of justice! In the name of ___ I will right wrongs and triumph over evil; and that means you!
  39. (with a look of boredom and frustration) More (enemy type)!! Gods, and I just finished cleaning up from the last bunch!!"
  40. (to the tune of the Ride of the Valkyrie)
    fight for justice, Kill For Truth, SLAY ALL EVIL, ta t-t-taaaa
  41. The cherry blossom falls upon the soil; the sword falls upon the foe.
  42. The day your sins rise against you is at hand!
  43. Die, head-in-the-clouds!"
  44. Come eat cold steel, things of the underworld!
  45. Throw down your swords and prepare to be judged!
  46. Drain _this_, fang-boy!
  47. Yo, she-bitch! (Unsheaths sword) Let's go!
  48. Nighty-night, zombies!
  49. Hey, ugly, green, and terminally unwashed! Come here and fight like a man!
  50. Go bleech your roots, creep!
  51. Allright boys, let's dance!
  52. Get some!
  53. Punish or be punished.
  54. Squeal like a pig!
  55. Start prayin' boy, and you better pray real good.
  56. Let's hang ten for Justice!
  57. Avaunt foul feindish thingy!!!
  58. I'll slay the evil fiend, and smile, because I smile a lot and have a lot of teeth.
  59. You had better watch your manners demon or I`ll give one hell of a wedgie!!!!
  60. Your shoes are untied!
  61. Evil doers beware!
  62. There can't be more than 50 of them, I won't be hurt!
  63. To have the courage for fighting means to have the courage for victory!"
  64. Within our quest we are invincible.
  65. Prepare to meet thy highest judge.
  66. Thy soul be blessed and thy sins forgiven.
  67. You ____ ! (infidel, heretic, mongrel, cur, cad, villain, slime)
  68. I'M GOING TO CUT YOUR HEART OUT WITH A SPOON!!!!
  69. I'm going to cut your heart out with a kender!
  70. Prepare to feel the Wrath of all that is good, Hell Spawn!
  71. Evil always turns in on itself - Justice shall prevail!
  72. For God and country!
  73. All that is good and holy, aid me now as I confront this vile evil!
  74. Prepare to atone for your sins!
  75. Renounce your foul deeds now and I shall spare you.
  76. I claim this land for all that is good, repent now and I shall not destroy you.
  77. Repent now or spend your after life in eternal damnation.
  78. With Justice (insert favorite deity) judges and makes war upon the foul and unrighteous!
  79. (insert favorite deity) has deemed you unworthy - I am his/her sword hand, prepare to meet damnation.
  80. When Evil walks abroad, I must confront it.
  81. With my dying breath I shall continue to remove the tarnish of your shadow from this world!
  82. Summon your faith! It shall make us strong in the face of this obscene evil!
  83. Prepare to feel the iron gauntlet of (insert favorite deity)!
  84. Surrender, cowardly followers of evil!
  85. I'm gonna KICK your sorry ass!
  86. DOOM!
  87. I am Ergol the magnificent: small in stature, large in power, narrow of purpose, and wide of vision. I have the power to make your piss turn blue!" while unsheathing sword: Let me introduce you to a friend of mine...
  88. Can you, like, surrender NOW or something?
  89. DDIIIIIIEEEEEEE!!
  90. DIE!DIE!DIE!DIE!DIE!DIE!DIE!DIE!DIE!DIE!
  91. Don't MAKE me come over there after you!
  92. So, come here often?"
  93. OH YEAH, want some more, do ya'. Come and get it, and get it.YEAH! Hey, I got some for you too! Here ya' go. Feels good, don't it!?!
  94. Just a flesh wound.
  95. If you kill me, I will only become more powerful!
  96. Let me convince you of the error of your ways.
  97. Tell me if this hurts.
  98. This is your ticket to the afterlife.
  99. It wouldn't be proper for me to put this back without killing SOMETHING!
  100. God befriend us, as our cause is just!"
  101. Doomsday is near; die all, die merrily"
  102. Say thy prayers, and farewell.
  103. and you shall know that I am the Lord when I strike upon thee with great vengence ...
  104. Holy Avenger Batman!

 

Back to Robin's Fantasy Role Playing Games Page.

bar

Copyright 2003 Robin Connor. All Rights Reserved.